Where are they now?

Yes, it's been a while - work and school have taken priority over writing - for the moment. Long term, nothing makes me happier than writing, so this is not permanent. However - there are only so many hours in a day - and 12 hour demanding shifts plus intensive courses to finish this degree have taken their toll on my free time. At the moment, I'm on a brief medical leave, and although I arose early to study Statistics (hey, my body had surgery, my brain did not!!) - I find myself here.

Hello, I missed you!

Let's bring you all up to date. We are still in Austin, and although I love it here most of the time, I still hate the heat. Since it's not hot right now, enough about THAT. Becca is working in our home state, where her circle of friends are. She''s about to make a job change that looks good for her, and is doing well, although I miss her greatly.

Brandon also returned to UCLA later that year to finish his degree, and had trouble finding a job in this economy. He stayed in Los Angeles for a few months working and trying to find an entry level position that related to his career goals, then returned to the Bay Area with the same lack of success. The job market is tough out there, and new grads are not only competing against each other, but all the older people that are out of work as well. His father pulled some strings and he was offered a good job, but at the last minute chose to go into the military. Apparently it was something he had been thinking about for a while...he's very driven and motivated, has aspirations and did not want to ride on his father's coattails, so to speak. There were a lot of things that attracted him to the military - travel, learning, making new friends - but this decision leaves me with such incredible trepidation I can barely voice it.

As a child, I spent a large amount of time with both sets of grandparents, since my mother was ill and hospitalized frequently. Thank God, literally, for my grandparents...they were a Godsend to both my parents and to me. As a child in Pennsylvania, I grew up with the ghost of their only son who perished in World War II - his picture in the living room, his Purple Heart framed on the wall, the memories of him everywhere. Their heartbreak was palpable throughout the years. They tried their best to go on, and did go on - but the anguish was always there under the surface. I swore as a child, and continued that vow; watching the Vietnam War on television while in my grandparent's living room, the news reports - that I would never let my son go into the service. I told myself I would never, ever let my son be a soldier. When Brandon was born, I cradled him in my arms and whispered to him I'd always, ALWAYS protect him. I even imagined that if the draft was ever reinstated I'd spirit him away to Canada if necessary. (TMI: By the time I gave birth to Becca and Brandon, I'd already lost my mother and sister - so I was fiercely, frighteningly overprotective!)

I never dreamed it would be HIS decision.

So....since I couldn't talk him out of it, I am now 1000% supportive of him. He's a very smart young man, and the military knows that, and he'll not be on the front lines, I'm told. I'm in prayer.

At his graduation from basic, when they walked out from the forest in clouds of colored smoke in formation, I was struck with panic and fear initially. This was everything I did not want for my cherished son, right in front of my very eyes. Everything I grew up with, right in front of me, in my ears, the noise, the drumbeats giving me a horrible sense of fear...it was just horrible...for the initial few moments. I needed to get a grip on my emotions, right THEN, before he saw what a mess I was. I needed to hold it together and be proud of him, for him, for all of them.

My other Grandfather had just passed in September. I could hear his voice saying "We've got him, Annie". The voice of comfort and reason once again - as always, my entire life growing up. You were my angels in this life, my Grandparents, now please be his angels up in heaven...

I collected my wits by the time the ceremonies were over, and we had a wonderful two days with Brandon and his buddies. I am incredibly proud of him, and of his choices. I will do whatever I need to do to be a supportive military mom. Thank you for listening while I pour my heart out.

In God We Trust

RIP Grant Richard Messenger

Kete (SS-369)

http://www.navsource.org/archives/08/08369.htm